Its after 1am and I am wide awake...as if I don't have to wake up at 6am to get ready for work. I haven't been able to sleep for the past few weeks. I have an idea why, I just don't want to admit that there is a problem. I don't want to think that I actually miss the man who broke my heart; not once, but twice in the last 6 months. I want to believe that I am over him. That I don't sit in bed at night wondering what (or who) he's doing...wanting to call just to hear his voice...yearning for his touch. I want to believe that he is in my past, never to be thought of again.
Too bad that's not going to happen.
I know that life shouldn't revolve around some guy, but that's just how it is sometimes. I am at the age where all of my friends are getting married (or are already married), have children, houses, careers. They have the total package. I'm not trying to rush things, it just seems like it should be my turn already. Not trying to toot my own horn, but I'm a decent catch. I just refuse to settle. I will not be disrespected, mistreated, unloved, or made to feel unpretty.
Is it too much to ask for to be held at night? to stay in on a Saturday night and enjoy each others company instead of hanging out at some hot, crowded night club? to end the night with a simple forehead kiss before falling asleep in his arms? to have a man who loves me when every fiber of his being?
Maybe it is. Perhaps I am looking for something that doesn't exist.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment