Why Does It Hurt So Bad???

I can't stop thinking about you.

You are all that I want. I thought I was over you. I keep crying when I really don't love you. But why does it hurt so bad???

When ever I have a moment to just sit still and listen to the sound of emptiness and nothingness, all I can think about is you. I miss what we didn't have. You made me laugh. You made me cry. You kept me at peace. You put me through a lot of mess, unneeded stress, mixed emotions. But for some reason you are the person I want to be with.

As simple as a forehead kiss....that is all I wanted from you. I never wanted you to be someone you weren't. I appreciated you for who you were. I still do. I just wanted a simple hug, a simple smile, a simple life with you.

What I was looking for wasn't impossible. I saw through every thing and realized that you were amazing. The epitome of perfection. I spent time thinking that there was something wrong with me, but there wasn't. My only problem was being to open...to honest...to forward with you.

If my straightforwardness is a problem, then so be it. What we could have had would have been amazing, nothing short of pure bliss. Even though I've drowned my sorrows in drink after drink after drink, you are on my mind even more. And when I sober up the next day, I still can't stop thinking about you.

Why does it hurt so bad? Why do I feel so sad. I thought I was over you, but I keep crying when I don't love you.

I gotta get you out of my head...